I’ve sat by in silence for a long time now about the way women’s bodies are constantly scrutinized. To set the record straight, I’m not upset for me, but for all the girls out there that are struggling with their body image. A size 2 is not fat, nor will it ever be. And being a size 0 doesn’t make you beautiful. To all girls with butts, boobs, hips and a waist, put on a bikini — put it on and stay strong.

— Jennifer Love Hewitt
“A size 2 is not fat!”
Dec 2007 Associated Press

Why It’s Moronic

It seems that poor Jen wasn’t quite as okay with her size-2 self as she adamantly claimed to be in several press outlets after being confronted with cellulite-laden bikini photos.

After what surely was a long summer of obsession (and sick-of-reassuring assistants), in August 2008, Hewitt secured the cover of Us Weekly with the huge headline “18 LBS IN TEN WEEKS!”

Way to stay strong for all the girls with “butts, boobs, hips and a waist,” Love!

— Kanye “Now Now” West
Kanye West says he’s ‘voice of this generation’
Nov 2008 Associated Press

Why It’s Moronic

Uh, oh. Kanye’s up to his old tricks again.

Based on the last item we posted from the “songster,” West has a yearly interview focused on reminding everyone how legendary he is.

If he’s correct in his assertion, it’s a sad day. I want the voice of my generation to be eloquent and learned (and not educated at the American Academy of Art, my alma mater), not someone who samples other people’s singing, rap-sings about how in love with Dior he is, and rhymes “now” with “now” as often as possible.

On second thought, he may be the loudest voice of his generation... but I don’t ever remember shouting over everyone being regarded as a positive quality.

— Stylist-to-the-stars Rachel Zoe
“Being Rachel Zoe”
Sep 2007 The New York Times Magazine

Why It’s Moronic

Zoe (pronounced “zoh”) got tongues wagging when she made this comment about her celebrity and influence compared to Anna Wintour, the all-powerful editress of Vogue (upon whom The Devil Wears Prada’s impossible antagonist is based).

This seems to be another case of I-think-I’m-bigger-than-I-am-itis. Yes, it’s a big deal to be profiled by the NYT, but I submit that outside fashion circles of New York and LA, most of America wouldn’t be able to name the woman if shown a photo.

Hundreds of advertisers would disagree about the assertion that Vogue can’t change a designer’s business. If advertising doesn’t work, it doesn’t sell.

Let’s give this comparison five years and see who comes out on top: The top fashion magazine that was established in 1892 and currently demands over $100,000 per full-page ad, or a heavy-handed marketer who’s been accused of encouraging drug use and anorexia to skinny up her charges—who’ve included Nicole Richie, Lindsay Lohan, and Mischa Barton at their thinnest.

— Chicago Mayor Richard M. Daley
“$100 million question elicits 10-cent answer...”
July 1999 Chicago Tribune

Why It’s Moronic

One of the pleasures of being a Chicagoan is witnessing the oratory antics of Mayor Richard M. Daley. He’s the guy who, during summer heatwaves, holds press conferences to remind the public not to do things like “lift weights in the sun” or “wear fur coats.” Seriously, the guy is not known for his intellect.

Chicago Tribune columnist John Kass has scored countless aces simply by publishing verbatim mayoral quotes, all the while keeping Daley in political check. (Some people’s judgment gets clouded simply because Daley plants a lot of greenery. Yes, the City of Big Shoulders is beautiful, but there’s a lot o’ nasty business behind the scenes.)

Rumor always has been that Daley’s in bed with mobsters, and in 1999, he found himself in trouble for allegedly having awarded an organized-crime family city contracts worth $100 million. When asked several questions about the scandal during a press conference, the mayor’s lack of verbal prowess (aka his low “Clinton Quotient”) was obvious.

I really wish someone really ballsy would come along. If you were in the same situation, wouldn’t your instinct be to say, “I answered your damn question; please shut up?” Why don’t politicos stop being so politically correct and start voicing some real thought? (Is that too much to ask?)

Click the article title for the complete story.

— Tyra Banks
“What’s Up Down There?”
November 2007 Tyra

Why It’s Moronic

When I heard the hype about Tyra’s “What’s Up Down There?” show, I was kind of impressed. Twenty years ago, would a show about frank vagina talk would be allowed on daytime TV? I thought, Tyra and her experts are sure to be upfront and informative, using lots of charts, photos, and technical jargon. It seemed like a good service for a young girl who is oppressed into thinking her genital region a far-off sector of the universe that doesn’t deem exploration.

Then came out an expert with a “vulva puppet.” Made of brown, magenta, and purple velvet and satin, the virtual stuffed animal was intended to make genitals more understandable to women. (What?) And even with the expert’s warning that “you likely won’t see velvet or satin on yours” (ha ha replied the audience), I found the thing a lackluster—and potentially confusing—representation of the real thing. I hope no male virgins were taking notes, because it’s just going to be disaster for them if they try to navigate the real-world landscape according to Tyra’s velveteen map.

Tyra furthered the weirdness by implying that real genitals are “scary.”