People used to ask June [Carter Cash] how, how she was doing, and she used to say, “I’m just tryin’ to matter,” and I know what she means, you know. I’m just tryin’ to matter and live a good life and make work that means something to somebody, and you have all made me feel that I might’ve accomplished that tonight.

— Reese Witherspoon
Oscar acceptance speech
2006 Academy Awards

Why It’s Moronic

Oscar winners need to settle down. Most think winning a statue—awarded by an exclusive group of colleagues—means they’re doing work that’s of paramount (ha ha, “Paramount”) importance to the world. (The public would give a fairer judgment of which Hollywood insiders matter to the general health of the world.) Reese, the daughter of a physician and a nurse, should know where actor-who-generally-stars-in-romantic-comedies stands in the hierarchy of important life purposes.

Don’t get me wrong: There are important films and important contributors to film, but it’s irritating to hear some of these people stroke themselves for showing up and doing their luxe jobs for a few weeks while there are doctors, nurses, and tons of other laborers who work hard for thirty years without any recognition, red carpet, or Nina Ricci gowns. If I won an Oscar (not that I’m trying), I’d really have mixed feelings about it, because 90% of that business is BS and hype.

Ms. Witherspoon is alleged to be a total hard-ass perfectionist (guess you’d have to be to demand her $29 million-per-picture price tag), but she sure is great at pulling out the simple-girl Nashville charm during appearances and interviews. The girl is good!