Maury Povich:

You are NOT the father.

Minnie Driver:

…it’s not like the trailer park that Eminem lived in.

Pete Wentz:

Nicole Richie:

…wrote songs that literally squeezed your heart…

Jessica Simpson:

One of these days these bites are gonna pop right into you.

Perez Hilton:

Perez is like a really gay Madonna.

Lindsay Lohan:

I’ll talk to you for the rest of the interview like this if you want…

Kanye West:

I’m an inspirational speaker.

Dina Lohan:

We’re just so misunderstood.

Vanessa Hudgens:

You just have to be smart about your decisions.

Chris Martin:

…And it was called “Yellow.”

George W. Bush:

…the people of Bulgaria ought to be proud…

Eva Mendes:

…tacos and french fries, it’s heavenly.